I wore this headband somewhere recently, and some dude was all like, “Well, looks the 1980s just arrived!  What are you?  Starring in a Judi Sheppard Missett Jazzercise workout video?”  No, A-hole!  And Who?  Jazzer-what?  Just kidding, I’ve actually heard of Jazzercising, but Judi Sheppard Missett?  Sorry, old timer.  And sorry again, because headbands are still dope AF.  And saying “dope AF,” is still dope AF.  Look, I love these things. I sweat a lot.  It keeps the sweat out of my eyes.  I hate the feeling of little hairs tickling my forehead when my Aquanet wears off.  It keeps my hair up and outta the way.  It looks rad.  So, if I help just one child realize he’s not alone, it’s natural to be this way, and that when you grow up, the larger world will accept that you’re a fully proud headbander, then I’ve done my job.   Now, excuse me, I must go rollerskating in my leg-warmers and off-the-shoulder over-size sweater.

If you actually read this, tweet me @willpfaffy – tell me “I love your dope headband, bro!”  Do it.  This is an experiment.

PRODUCER WILL